In true Mastoboard fashion, I've started this thread so we can all discuss our poop, pooping habits, and so on. To start, I am about to take a poop. In fact, I am prairie dogging as I type this so I best end right here.

Soon to be relaxing his sphincter,
Newfie_Metal

after I took those mushrooms in Canada , I shit some kinda Red toxic waste that was totally new to me.

I have shit in bags at festivals.

I have shit my pants at a festival only to find that my best mate has also shit his pants too, funny thing tho - a tent thief tried robbing my tent and put his hand inside a bag of shitty draws.

Gino thought it would be good to shit right outside the truck door of the van we hired for a festival , when he was up on E.
.Didnt smell so good the next morning.
In fact I thought I had shit myself again.


I have tons of these.

Is it normal to relieve yourself at least once a week?

yes

My friend bod was only 7 stone , but would consume steaks bigger than most could handle.
After eating he would curl up in a ball and not move. And not shit for days like a snake.

Everyone should post cellphone photos of their shit.

I had a friend that did that... If he took a unique looking shit he took a photo of it with his phone. His phone was filled with shit pictures.

I second the motion to take photos of our shit.

I do about 100 Courics a day. 2-3 times a day, anywhere, anytime.

First one to post a picture of their shit WINS!!!

Being hungover and shitting and then puking at the same time is the worst thing ever. Next time that occurs I will photograph it and post it for epic wins, a nice 2 for the price of 1 deal

Great thread.

I had this nightmare train ride once.

I got sick and my stomach was all over the place so I went to the WC onboard the train to take a shit.
Holy goddamn that dump was like letting the niagara falls loose. Anyway, whilst giving the toilet a new colour, I started feeling really nauseous and felt I needed to be sick, so I bent over to throw up in the hand-basin whilst half lying down on the floor with my pants at my ankles, trying not to shit myself.

That was the worst poopie ever.

Oh my god!
That's amazing!

Oh, so you think that is amazing ?

Wait until you see this:







SCROLL DOWN AT OWN WILL.
















I WARNED YOU MAGGIE.

Fuck!
Dats nasty!

Oh, so you think that is nasty?

Wait until you see reznier getting buttfucked by his ugly ass girlfriend.

Now thats what I call nasty.

ahh, internet.



Hungover shits are massively cathartic. I welcome them.

Rubbish jap porn, they will always wimp out.
You should see how the Germans eat shit!
Uber Scat Generals!!!!

link me

I've pm-ed you some.
You have been warned.

Salsa Snack. Just throwing it out there.

I saw some funky German stuff involving gas masks once, I've never been the same.

Now if her vagina wasnt pixalated that would have been in bad taste...


... Anyways I am a twice a day dude myself. Before and after work, its usually about 12 hours apart. I couldnt go at work. Im kinda germaphobic and feel more relaxed in my own enviroment! Hahaha.

ha, you're Shit-break.

You're all a bunch of daisies, I spend more time on the porta-pottys at festivals than watching bands.

I just love shitting on piles of shit that have been deposited by other festival goers.

667's ideal poop session:

1) Three to five minutes
2) Smooth, but with a bit of fight
3) Minimal wiping

REVOLVER magazine is good to have close by

You have been warned





close your eyes









I'm not kiddding








this is real













edited because I figured the mods would. But damn that was a great one.

What an anti climax...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-IrlhLF1c3k...player_embedded

Look how these long turds are touching this slime!

Nasty!

I went for like a three or four mile run some spring weekend up to the top of this big hill and back. A little more than halfway through, I started to get this really bad stomachache. I tried to run it off, but it was going nowhere. I felt horrible, sick, nauseous, so I slowed to a walk. But even that got to be too much, so I lay down on the road in the sun, listening to my MP3 player (great gig in the sky- pink floyd, i still remember) and let out some really really stinky wet farts, it was so bad.

But I was still like a mile and a half from home, and I realized I needed to get there asap and take a shit. So I got up and started walking again. About a minute later I could stand it no longer and I ran into some poor dude's back yard, a sort of pond/swamp type thing (with at least some cover), and got my pants down just as a massive diarrhea dump ejected itself from my asshole. This is like 2:00 in the afternoon, in the suburbs.

I wiped the best I could and as quickly as I could with some reed things and walked home with poopy pants. It was uncomfortable.

^^^I fucking LOL'd!!!

Like three or four weeks ago I had a band rehearsal. I was in the area and one of the tires on my car was dangerously low on air so I decided to show up to the church (where we practice) an hour early and kill some time until the other guys show up. I had just eaten Taco Bell and I could feel the shit rushing it's way to my asshole. I knew I was in trouble! I couldn't get into the church until our guitarist/singer arrived. I could feel the river of liquid shit breaching the flesh dam that is my asshole. So I pulled down my pants and went in the grass on the back side of the church. But... BUT!!! I couldn't control my pissing mechanism whilst shitting so naturally, only having my pants pulled down just enough to expose my ass... I pissed my pants..... FUCK!!!!!!!

But my pissy pants and shitty ass didn't stop me from enjoying band practice!!! Business as usual!

Thats. Just. Awkward.

Long-lasting hangover, too much coffee, having eaten nothing but french fries and greasy sauce for three days = a very sore and unhappy rear end.

No word of a lie, I almost shit my pants an hour ago. I made it to the shitter just in time to safely jettison the contents of my bowels, and when I say jettison I mean it. The shit blasted out of my ass with such force that a significant amount of toilet water sprayed my ass. Overall, a great experience.

^^^ bahahahaha

I know time was a factor there but i usually put some toiler paper down in the toilet to prevent splash back. lol.

^ THIS THREAD
the end of world is near

i just took a behemoth dump and it gave me a head ache

=(

Did you ever burst your eye's capillaries taking a mighty turd?

I often feel uneasy after a huge shit. Having that sort of void in my innards makes me feel hollow. I guess thats how some women who've just given birth feel.

You shouldnt force man. It killed Elvis.

lately my stomach has been acting up and making me feel like i have to shit constantly. usually i shit twice a day, morning and night. the same goes for now except the feeling of shitting still stays with me throughout the day, but if i try usually nothing happens. who knows, better than shitting out blood or something.

You guys know nothing of shitting your pants.

Doctor prescribed me some weight loss pills that stop your body from absorbing 30% of the fat that you eat.

Ever had light brown oil seeping out yer ass every time you fart? It aint pretty.

NB: Have not been on these for 2 years, weight loss is not worth shitty pants.

I took similar pills when I was 12/13 as part of a paid weight loss study. The oil shitting is the worst thing ever. I couldn't believe it. I actually shit myself at six flags because of that fucking pill, and I wasn't even on a ride, I was in the parking lot waiting for the bus to come. I left a nice oily spot on the bus seat

You're my hero.

A friend of mine constantly shat her pants when off her face. We were once having a wee down an alleyway together and she crapped herself. Good times.

Update: I had two poops today.

I had a horrible hungover shit today. Lamb doner, chilli and garlic sauce.

I ate 4 bags of TGIF hot fries one night woke up the next morning and shit glowing neon orange..

One time I shit atleast a 3-4ft long turd at my friends house..

One time at tech school I shit one atleast 6 ft.. not even kidding it was so long it coiled around the bowl.. i had people come look at it.. best of all it was in the girls bathroom.. left it in there